The successful applicant will have a demonstrated ability to:
1) carry out everyday tasks with a far greater degree of pomposity than remotely justified in context;
2) forget every piece of technical procedure ever learned and rely on the services of a PA in much the same way that a foetus relies on an umbilicus and placenta; and
3) disregard all impracticality, illegality, and stupidity from all instructions received from superiors interstate and deliver these instructions as gospel to subordinates.
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